fraternizing with the folks

November 7, 2006

Posted on previous blog on August 12, 2006

fraternizing with the folks

the other day i went to mcD’s with the rental units with a pad of paper and a pen in hand to make a real attemt to explain to them what i do. for my father, this was more of a lesson about what i will not eventually become… that is, telling my dad that, ‘no daddy, your daughter is not going to be a doctor in the GP sense… no daddy, just because i want to get my doctorate that doesn’t mean i can or want to diagnose people.’

in total, 5 coffees, 2 egg mcmuffins, a muffin, 5 sheets of paper, and 3 pictograms later… ‘ga jia, whatever you do i don’t get but it’s ok… daddy and mommy support you’

fast forward 2 days… this morning:

daddy dearest asks me: “ga jia, how much more school you have… take so long!”

“well, probably another 3-5 years”, i reply while hacking at pork cutlets with him.

“why take so long? phd easy right?”

i look up at him, honestly hoping that he’s developed a sense of humor in English and is only teasing me. he’s not. and i don’t know how to tell him that it hurts that he thinks this school stuff is easy.

i recount this story to my brother who laughs and jokingly mocks my dad while he’s not there: “yeh sure dad, school just gets easier and easier”. he gets it – i think.

fast forward to dinner this evening:

i’m bitching about girls who only care about their appearance and daddy says: “what’s wrong with that? that’s better right?”

i look around the table for support… none. i want to scream now: ‘is that what you want!? then maybe you need a better social network with which to support your daughter who should have only been born to look pretty and marry rich!’

but i’m just hungry and cranky and i know my father doesn’t really mean this. something must have been lost in the translation…

and so, i plug in positives into my own re-translations, because i know from his actions that he doesn’t mean such things (mostly).

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